Tonight we add a candle to our tradition………
No matter the age, the season, or the year, saying Goodbye is always hard. Two days short of Christmas we lost Grandpa Bill, my dad’s dad. Even though we knew it was coming, it doesn’t make it any easier. It’s an added lost. An added name to the many we miss as we celebrate the holidays. We continue to gather as a family but there is still a hole, an emptiness for those not able to share in the celebration with us. Our family left feeling a little incomplete.
As we heard of the passing of my grandpa, questions started filling my mind. Was David there to greet him? Was there a choir of angels? Were millions awaiting his arrival? Did Jesus say, welcome, you’ve done good my good and faithful servant? Did it happen like we imagine?…….I don’t know.
My Grandpa Bill always wrestled with his faith. He didn’t feel he was deserving. But, who is? I wrote him a letter after David passed letting him know he was loved beyond just us on this earth. That everyone, no matter the sin, can be forgiven. My grandma called us on his last day giving us the opportunity to say our goodbyes. My last words to him were letting him know, David doesn’t want to be stood up in Heaven. I told him It’s never too late to be saved. It’s never too late to ask the lord for forgiveness. Even though he wasn’t able to respond at that point, I hoped my words resonated and that he was able to have that moment with God.
Tonight, Christmas Eve, we sang Holy Night, Noel, and some of the other christmas favorites. We worshipped a God that loved us so much that he sent his only son to die for our sins. As we sang, I felt peace. Peace that my grandfather’s welcome may not have been like David’s. But, instead….there was a God, a light….a chance….a choice. And the moment he took that last breath……he made the choice to choose the light.
As I cried more tears another holiday season……Parker looked at me. He said, “Mommy, why are you crying silly?” My response…”Parker, I am crying because my Grandpa is no longer here. ” As always my sweet Parker’s words brought me back to peace as he replied, “Mommy, that doesn’t matter. He is with daddy and Jesus in heaven………”
And with that…..I have my peace. I thank God for that moment. I believe he did choose the light and Parker was there to tell me.
Hug your loved ones this Christmas. Cherish the moments small and big. With regrets know there is hope. With doubt know there will be peace. But, most importantly, serve others. Love others. Share life.
Once again, I beyond humbled by the many that always reach out to Audrey, Parker and I during the holidays. I believe with all my heart, God will bless you for the way you bless us. No matter the years that pass and the peace we have, we still miss a great man. We pray a prayer of gratitude for each of you daily but especially this holiday season. it is through you, we are blessed. Thank you.
Romans 8:18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.
Taking Steps By Faith,