It’s not just a house; it’s our home. We didn’t just buy it; we’ve lived in it. It’s not just a structure; it’s our life. Its been torn down room by room, but it’s being rebuilt. It wasn’t built for the ware and tare, but the foundation holds it together. Living in it, like it is, wouldn’t be livable. The remodel will never be finished, at least in this world. Some pieces come and go, our hands get tired, as do our hearts. We attempt to do it all on our own until we finally realize… we need to hire a fixer upper.
Only this fixer upper doesn’t cost money. He really doesn’t get much of the credit. We take all the credit. We let him in slowly, room by room. That is, the rooms we want him to see. We worry about what others will think of his work, our work. Will they believe it? If not, we will just keep quiet. But, they have to wonder right? How did our house get like this? What happened to the old? Oh, it’s still there. It still holds some of the same old only now it is complimented and beautified with the new.
When David and I first moved to Waco, there were many raised eyebrows. Many people questioned and wondered why Waco? They would say, “Isn’t that where that David Koresh guy held those people hostage”? Thank goodness that “crazy” is not what we experienced when we moved there. Instead, we witnessed friendship, complete outreach, support and community; one that didn’t involve following a cult leader, unless you’re talking about Baylor. Now, when I mention once living in Waco, the raised eyebrows have changed to jumps of joy as people now ask if I have a special friendship with Joanna and Chip Gaines from the show Fixer Upper. Nope, but I have a friend, of a friend, of a friend, of a friend that does…does that count? Oh, and I have a friend that looks like her.
For me, I am on a different fixer upper show. Only it’s not my house, it’s my life. And sometimes it does feel a lot like reality TV.
I have seen a father of two love and cherish his two children with every ounce of his being.
I have seen a husband and friend who was devoted for ten years of marriage.
I have seen David’s house fall apart and his children’s lives shattered as their image of what a family should be is crumbled to pieces. I have seen their security, their shelter taken away and the bright colors of the walls fade to grey and fall. I have seen a wife who did everything she could to hold the walls up around them only to become so tired she went into a depression, guilt and feelings of failure. It was a home that from the inside seemed unfixable. But, from the outside looking in, the home still looked as is.
Although the walls inside fell…the foundation stood and the structure held.
God, the ultimate fixer upper took the broken and brought the pieces together. Lots of them! He remodeled a story that really never fell apart but was just being made new.
The list goes on……..a story continues.
We are not a rock star family. We aren’t doing this on our own. We still want to ask and understand the why. Not just of our loss, but also of all the loss we see around us. We never stopped believing. Our house will not stand on it’s own, not without faith. We need something so much more than this. When life eventually stops standing, as we will all part this world, what’s next?
What’s next is something better than what we just lived. It ‘s not broken or in need of just any fixer upper. It has been remodeled this whole time to perfection. From the color of furniture to the rooms that were created and behind it all, will be the one and only fixer upper.
Taking Steps By Faith,